For the love of God and all that is holy, stop making the books that I love into movies!!!

Worst. Film. Adaptation. Ever.

Dear Mr. Peter Jackson,

I would just like to start off by saying that I love your adaptations of the Lord of the Rings, and I am eagerly awaiting The Hobbit. With that being said, I’d like to ask you a question and then a favor. The question: Why oh why does Hollywood destroy everything that I love? It keeps building up my hopes of something equal to your adaptations and only ends up breaking my heart. Here’s a rough list of what has caused me intense emotional/literary scarring in the past few years:

*All of the Chronicles of Narnia movies

*The Golden Compass

*Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief

*The Last Airbender

*The Legend of the Seeker

These movies started off with broad fan bases, excellent plots and casts of characters, and high levels of interest. They get huge budgets and stellar actors. They then flush it all down the toilet by trying to please a very broad, general American audience by changing things, which doesn’t actually help the non-fans understand the plot any better and only pisses off the real fans. All of this ends up with no one liking the film and ensuring that the rest of the trilogy remains in book form.

Now for the favor. I can think of three ways that you could potentially help this disease of Hollywood.

1.) Direct everything of any literature value or importance because you’re amazing and true to the source.

2.) Convince the big wigs of the industry to let Joss Whedon have total creative freedom and have him help you with all of the good adaptations.

3.) Teach other directors with potential how to research and create a script that doesn’t piss off the existing fan base.

Do you think that you could have any influence on the shocking state of nerd culture in Hollywood? Or at least, book/literature nerd culture? The only adaptations that don’t leave me crying and seeking professional help seem to be the graphic novel films, but I suppose that’s because the idiots who write screenplays already essentially have a storyboard in front of them. Thank you very much Mr. Jackson.


A lit nerd

3 responses to “For the love of God and all that is holy, stop making the books that I love into movies!!!

  1. another little nerd

    Thank you for that comment, how true ! You might want to add the Harry Potter movies to that list, except the first one. I saw the last one yesterday and was horrified.
    That being said, and while addressing Peter Jackson, if he wants to turn Sword of Truth into movies, it would probably be the best news of the year.

  2. What? You hated entire Narnia movies? I thought these were faithful to the source material. Joss Whedon should have wrote and directed Percy Jackson movie. What’s your thought on the upcoming The Hunger Games movie?

    • I HATED the Narnia movies. “The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe” wasn’t *terrible*, but Prince Caspian was horrible and I didn’t even SEE the Dawn Treader, the previews looked so bad. They added in battles in Prince Caspian. And I REALLY hate that they had Susan’s character fight in battles. Lewis is VERY clear about his feelings towards women in the battlefield which is: it shouldn’t happen. Ever. They messed up the timeline of Prince Caspian too. And the whole teenage romance thing going on between Caspian and Susan is DISGUSTING and SO WRONG. And the Voyage of the Dawn Treader was a spiritual journey type of book, not an action packed adventure on the high-seas like the preview made it look. So yes, I hated all of the Narnia movies. The only aspect of it that they didn’t mutilate was the relationship between Aslan and Lucy.

      I’ll be interested to see if they get Hunger Games right, although I have very little faith.

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